I Think I’m A Cool Mom, So I Don’t Know Why My Daughter Is Rebelling
By: Angie Woodward
“I’m not a regular mother. I’m a cool mom, right? If you’re going to drink, I’d rather you to do it in the house.” “I just want you to know, if you ever need anything, there are no rules in this house”. Does any of this sound familiar? If rebellion is born out of restrictions and being told “no”, how does it happen in families where parents are liberal, tolerant and supportive of individual freedoms?
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Rebelling is Caused By a Struggle For Identity
Since rebelling is caused by a struggle for identity, studies suggest that moms and dads who think they are helping their kids through the teenage years by actually enabling them to practice bad behavior and law breaking experiences, are fooling themselves. Adolescents do not respect parents who knowingly allow their homes to be a safe haven for delinquents.
Basically, every mother wants to be the “Cool Mom”; it’s human nature. We all want to be well liked and popular. So, it really is not the question of what we want, it’s the fact that we need to do what’s best for our children.
There are times when you can be an awesome parent by creating an environment in your home where the teenagers love to come “hang out” or by being up on the latest technology. You can actually spend time with your child by doing the activities that they like to do. You can let your kids be kids, so what if they rough house or cause spills on the carpet. And always being available for talking with them and listening to them can make the most awesome parents.
Forget Yourself and Be A Responsible Parent!
There are times when you have to put aside what you want and be a responsible caretaker. It may cost you part of your relationship with your daughter, but if you do your parental job, she will thank you for it later.